When you deny that something exists, you take a risk. Consciously or unconsciously, you may feel safer in denial, but that does not change the reality of a situation.
It is tempting to stay in denial. Sometimes you do not even realize that you are there. Certain situations are hard to face, such as when you have a conflict with someone who has influence over your future, you have something difficult to tell a colleague or there is something you are doing that you know is not good for you, but will be hard to change.
When you are in denial, part of you is asleep. You are blocking out reality. This cannot help you and you risk suffering consequences that you are not ready for. Sometimes, it can take a while before you realize you are in denial. However, once you do, it is in your best interest to face what is there and to move on.
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When something “hooks” me, either in a good way or bad, I find it useful to ask myself “does it matter?” The reason I do this is that some experiences and situations can knock me off balance and my response can be out of proportion to what is happening.
The next time you have an experience that creates a strong reaction, try asking yourself does it matter? Doing so allows you to gain perspective and respond from a place of power. Asking the question centers you, allowing you to get through experiences in control of yourself and to avoid creating messes you have to get out of later.
photo: Ashish_Choudhary, pixabay.com
Do you ever get yourself to a place where you think you have no choice in a situation? That is a falsity. You always have choice. Saying you have no choice is giving away your power.
Thing is, you may have a hard choice in front of you that you would rather not face. Better to face that hard choice. It never serves you to abdicate your power of choice.
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A quickening is something that compels you to move faster. A quickening can be caused by many things – a person that challenges you, a sudden insight that motivates you, a disappointment that closes a door, an experience that compels you to move forward. You can say yes or no to a quickening. It is your choice. You can opt out of it or accept its challenge.
In my experience, quickenings are often positive occurrences even when they are uncomfortable at first. Have you experienced any quickenings in your life or career? How did they go? Learn to recognize quickenings and make the most of them.
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Walls have different functions. When you build a wall best to know its purpose. Is your wall meant to protect you, keep others out or to serve another intention? Make sure the wall serves the purpose you intend it for.
What is a wall? A wall is a separation; a way to keep yourself in or something or someone else out. You can build a wall as protection from someone who does not act in your interest. You can build a wall because you are fearful of something or someone. You can build a wall for detachment, so that you can trust your perception of a situation.
Sometimes, you can build a wall unconsciously, driven by your emotions. Once you do so, the wall is affecting you and can have negative consequences that you are not even aware of. When you build a wall, know what you are doing. Walls are barriers – make sure they serve a positive purpose before you build one.
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At the start of the new year, are you proactive or reactive? You have a choice – to actively begin the year the way you want it to be or to let the new year take you on a ride that is determined by what happens to you.
What are you beginning this year? What dreams are you moving closer to? What skills are you enhancing? What changes are you preparing for?
Better to set your direction, than to drift without aim. Make 2016 a year of your choosing!
There are all kinds of transitions: ones you make happen, ones that happen to you, ones that surprise you, positive ones and negative ones. What kind of transition will 2016 be for you? Have you taken charge of your transition? What do you want it to be?
Make 2016 your best transition ever; one that moves you closer to your dreams, lets go of things that no longer serve you and creates experiences that bring you joy.
photo: Antranias, pixabay.com
In The Managers Hub, I don’t often write about having too little to do! This weekend, I read an intriguing article in The New York Times titled: Bored To Tears By A Do-Nothing Dream Job. What an anomaly in today’s world!
It is an interesting continuum with boredom on one end and stress and speed on the other.
By chance, have you found yourself in this situation of not having enough to do at work? It can be a downhill slide, if you are not aware of how it is affecting you. Best to address it and make sure it is something you can handle. It has its advantages, but make sure they are advantages you choose to have in your life.
The rest of you may wish for just one day with not enough to do!
photo: Stuart Miles, FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Reality: the world or the state of things as they actually exist, as opposed to an idealistic or notional idea of them.
Are your life and actions aligned with reality? You may say reality is a downer. It can be, but it is the best place to start from. Reality does not limit you or dictate your next steps. It just needs to be factored in, so that your choices come both from truth and the present moment.
Say that you are in what looks like a lose-lose situation at work. Do you pretend what is happening isn’t there? Or do you look carefully at the reality of what exists and find your way through it? I think the latter. When you align with reality, no matter how bad things are, you actually are in a very powerful place. Truth sets you free.
photo: Danilo Rizzuti, FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Do you find yourself looking down a lot – at your phone? There have been many changes in our business communication styles. How are you adjusting to them? Do they serve or hinder you as a manager?
You do have choice in how and when you communicate – exercise it. Communications styles do not have to be dictated to you. Choose the style of communication that allows you to be fully present in the moment and to communicate effectively. You may not be able to use your chosen style of communication, every time. However, you may be surprised how often you can, when you exercise your choice.
photo: debspoons, FreeDigitalPhotos.net